What are Twin Flame Connections and How Can I Tell if I Have Met Mine?

I did a quick google search this morning and the top two results for the keyword twin flame were Twin Flame Universe and the Netflix show Escaping Twin Flames. I found it funny how there is so much conflicting advice that the top two ranking pages contradict one another. The first, a couple who claims they can magically get you into a physical relationship with whoever you believe is your twin flame, if you will only follow their protocol to a T. The second, a show about people who had awful experiences with the first couple’s advice! Farther down, there was a medical news article talking about the idea, stating that the concept of twin flames is, in fact, a myth. I have been hesitant to write about this topic, but I want to help people who may be experiencing this clear up what this magical (but very real) connection truly is all about. Let’s dive in.

The concept of twin flames dates back to Greek mythology. Plato talks about twin flames as a unified being split into two bodies because the power they carried as one, was too great for this world. He talks of how they spend their embodiments here on Earth searching for one another, a constant call back to the other, who, in a strange way, is actually themselves. This really touches on the essence of the divine connection we call twin flames, or Elizabeth Claire Prophet called twin rays.  Another myth, the story of Isis and Osiris, explains the divine and eternal love that these magical counterparts share, depicting the lengths to which individuals will go for the love of their lifetime (and every other lifetime).

The true essence of the twin flame connection is when you meet someone who triggers you, lights you up, inspires you to be your very best, and in the same way, encourages you to face your inner demons. The call of the mirror self, or twin flame, is asking, can you see yourself for who you truly are, and love that version of yourself? Can you accept your worst parts, love them unconditionally, and choose a path of ascension through first healing those wounded parts of yourself?

Some signs that you may have met this person, are, in addition to what I have mentioned:

A strange sense of recognition. The feeling that you have known one another forever. The ability to sense one another’s feelings and deepest desires, without even needing to communicate them. An example of this might be that one counterpart expresses a life goal to the other, who is shocked to find this has always been their own life goal but they had never actually put it into words before!

Intense Attraction. Now, this one can be tricky. Sometimes we are attracted to what hurt us in the past, because we have trauma bonds. This is not it. Its more of an attraction to the mind, although the physical part can be stronger than any physical desire you have ever experienced, as well. It is the desire to understand them, to just be close to them, to know how they think and why they feel what they feel, to want to have deep conversations about things you have never talked about with anyone before.

An almost instant triggering to heal. This is where twin flame coaches get so far off. Twin flame connection is meant to heal both counterparts, not to drag one into an abusive situation. This is why, when you meet your counterpart, you may be instantly triggered or reminded of a wound from your childhood. Your twin flame counterpart may be the one to trigger this by unhealed behavior. If this happens, you may, for the first time, recognize how toxic this behavior truly is. More on this later, because this is NOT a sign to jump into a relationship with them, REGARDLESS if you have a soul connection with them.

Dreams. This may or may not happen instantly. For some, this happens when you have cut physical ties. It is the universe, and your other half, softly whispering “there is more to do here!”. Again, if your counterpart is toxic, a dream about them doesn’t mean you need to call them up and beg to be together. It simply means your souls are confirming the connection SO THAT you can do the deep healing involved with the wounds. However, repeated dreams of the other counterpart may be a sign that you are, indeed, connected.

Dream contact as you heal. This one is almost unmistakable. If you choose a path of healing and have gone into a physical separation from your other half, and the dreams get stronger the more that you heal, this is a clear-cut sign that you have indeed met your twin soul. This happens because the universe wants you to know that the connection is real. You are being purged from the unhealthy parts of the connection but that doesn’t mean the connection doesn’t exist.

Physical Similarities

This is a weird one. Because you two are truly connected, you may share many physical traits. Being close to the same height, having the same eye color, the same nose, or, in a different way, having the same illnesses throughout life. I have even seen it where one was married or in a relationship that lasted the same amount of time as the relationship you were in and ended within the same time frame. Mirroring elements of your lives are not coincidences. They simply confirm the reality of this beautiful connection.

Now, I want to talk about what to do if you have met your twin flame, especially if he or she has chosen not to have a physical connection with you. I think this is where a lot of misinformation exists. If coaches can sell a formula to get you to your counterpart and make big bucks, they will. This is why many twin flame coaches claim to be able to get you “into union” as the twin flame jargon goes, by following a specific formula. The truth is, each of us has free will. We have been given the ability to decide if we want the connection in the physical. If your counterpart has chosen not to have it, then you following a formula won’t change their mind. It will, however, blind you to the work that you need to do on yourself to evolve as a human. It will also create illusion and doubt in your life. It will blind you from all the beauty that this universe wants to gift you. It will take your youth, your beauty, your life energy, and throw them to a person who wants nothing to do with you. THIS IS TOXIC. If any coach or twin flame expert tells you how to magically get your counterpart into a physical connection with you, they are lying, straight up.

There is no magic formula. Following are some truths about twin flames that I want to close with. If the other person truly is your twin ray, then working on yourself will affect them. You just don’t know if that will make it so they want to be with you in this lifetime. The lesson in twin flame connections is surrender. It is giving up on a specific end goal like union in pursuit instead of following your highest calling in life. If you are learning lessons, they are too. But maybe their lesson is to marry someone who will treat them poorly instead of love them unconditionally like you would. If you try to force a connection, you take away their lesson. A major lesson of the twin flame connection is acceptance and releasing outcomes. It is learning that true love is about letting someone go, not trying to control their life. If you truly love them, let them go. They will come to you in divine timing, but you don’t know if that will be in this lifetime, or the next or the next. This is why it is all about letting go of a specific template. The true essence of this divine journey, like I have said previously, is a profound call back to the self. It is a journey to become your best self, through the mirror lessons of a twin soul.

If you are interested in finding more resources to learn more about these divine connections, I recommend my book I Swiped Left Again: The Evolving Woman’s Guide to Dating, Twin Flames, and Healing; as a twin ray myself, I understand these concepts better than anyone. I also recommend Twin Flames: Beyond the Veil of Illusion by Cynthia Greer, a spiritualist and twin flame with over 40 years of experience working with actual twin flame connections. In closing, I invite you to leave me a comment or question if you have experienced any of these symptoms or believe that you have met your twin flame counterpart.